


Not just the bad guy...

by Fander_girl



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-18
Updated: 2019-03-05
Packaged: 2019-10-12 05:14:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,595
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17461301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fander_girl/pseuds/Fander_girl
Summary: Quite simply, something has gone wrong with Virgil. Everywhere he turns, Roman is right there. But something is making Virgil seem more terrified of Roman than he ever was before. Will he defeat the evil from within or will he slowly fade from Thomas' life?





	1. Something's Wrong...

Virgil's POV

I don't fit in. 

Nobody likes me.

I'm ALWAYS the bad guy.

These thoughts swirl around in my head for so long that I can't think straight. Well, I'm not straight so that shouldn't matter. It started when I first came here. I was the one whom nobody liked. Sure, Patton was friendly, but I know he didn't actually like me. I was the cruel one. The side that provided rude commentary and looks of pure hatred. There was just one thing that sent me over the edge. Roman.

I sit up in my bed and choke back a sob, letting the pain settle inside of me, not wanting to alert the others of something being wrong. Quietly, I head towards the kitchen to get a snack. I haven't eaten in 4 days and my stomach is aching from the absence of food.

While opening the fridge, I hear a familiar voice. "Hey, kiddo!" Patton. I look to my right to see him staring at me with a wide grin. Slowly, I give him a reassuring smile and a wave to let him know that I'm okay. Suddenly, I feel a tingling sensation. Surely the fanciful side is just around the corner. My insides start to shrink and my hands begin shaking. "Virgil? What's wrong my dark, strange son?" He rushes over and tries to touch my shoulder. On instinct, I flinch and give out a yelp. Without thinking, I run to my room, leaving a quite perplexed Dad in the kitchen.

Roman's POV

Seeing Virgil fled the scene, I came to Patton for questioning. "Uh...what was that, padre?" I asked him. "It seems that Panic at the Everywhere was in a hurry to be somewhere? Perhaps causing Thomas more distress?"

"Now, Roman. You know that Virgil is STILL one of us," Patton said sternly.

"R-right. Absolutely."

"Would you like some dinner? I'm going to make orange chicken and triple layer cake"

I try to ignore his plead for some "quality time" that he is desperately craving. His eagerness was so obvious that I wanted to squeeze the sadness right out of the poor guy. "Uh...not now. My mind is too perplexed at the moment. Perhaps Logan will join you! He seems to be well, particularly...cheerful....today!" Seeing the smile wipe off of Patton's face killed my insides but I was dying to know what was wrong with Virgil. Giving Patton a quick hug and a smile, I made my descent to Virgil's room. Something was going on with him. And I'm going to get to the bottom of it. 

 

 

** Hey everyone! This is my first ever story on here so I'm excited to continue with it. I will try to update as frequently as I can and if you have any suggestions for upcoming events, please let me know! Thanks!**


	2. Never Meant to Hurt Him

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something's going on with Virgil. I wonder what's making him so frightened?

Roman's POV

Arriving at the door, I hear a faint sob. Quickly, my heart began to hurt as I thought of what pain I put him in. "Virge, may I come in?" No response. Only the sounds of his short, gasping breaths. With shaking hands, I reach for the door handle and jiggle it. Locked, obviously. I didn't know what to do. Surely, he needed help and wasn't allowing me to provide assistance. "I'm going to grab Patton, okay? He'll know what do to." 

 

Virgil's POV

Hearing the sound of Roman's footsteps leave the door was much less than comforting. Although I hated him with all of my being, I still wished he had stuck around enough to even try talking with me and calming me down. Even him breaking down the door would have been enough to let my spirits soar a little. As my sobs died down, I crawled onto my bed and curled into a ball. My hands were still shaking whilst my heart was still loudly pumping. 

Quietly, without any noise, I reach over to my desk drawer and pull out something. Something that has helped me through thick and thin in need of emergency. A small, shiny blade. Pulling up my sweatshirt sleeve, I run my fingers over the many scars on my arm from the other times. I grab the blade and make a small, but deep, mark. My eyes start tearing up again, but the pain was comforting. I make another mark, this time deeper. Blood starts flowing out and dropping on my comforter. Three marks, four, five.

Someone knocks on the door.

My insides turn to ice as I look up at the door in surprise. "Virgil? Kiddo, it's me! Can I come in?" 

I sigh in relief at the sound of Patton's voice. I stand up, put my sleeve back down, and unlock the door. Slowly, I walk back to my bed and put my hood up. The door creaks open and I see a blue cardigan. "Kiddo, what's wrong?" I look up at the moral side with tears in my eyes. "H-help me", I whisper. The little smile on his face quickly diminishes into a sad frown, his eyes growing wider with concern.

 

Patton's POV

As soon as Roman told me what was going on, I rushed to Virgil's door. It pains me to see any of my sons in pain. Taking a few deep breaths, I knock on his door. "Virgil? Kiddo, it's me!" No sound came from within. "Can I come in?" I hear him unlock the door after a few moments of utter silence. I wait a couple seconds and then open the door. Looking around his room, I see Virgil sitting on his bed, his hood covering his face. I reach out my hand and give him a reassuring smile. "Kiddo, what's wrong?" He looks up at me with the saddest of eyes and says, "H-help me." Almost immediately, my "cheer-up-kiddo" attitude changed and my protective side came out. 

Without warning, I rush over to him and give him a bear hug. After breathing a small, broken sigh, Virgil leans in and hugs even tighter, crying as hard as I've ever heard him. My heart slowly began to break at the sound. "It's okay, let it out Virgil." He starts crying harder as I run my hands through his hair to try to calm him down. "Now, tell me what's upsetting you so much, kiddo" Releasing his grip on my shoulder, he looks up at me and says one word: Roman.

 

**Hello all! This one is a little bit longer and I'm sorry for waiting so long to do it. I've been quite the busy bee. Anyways, I hope you all enjoyed this chapter as there is more to come. Again, if you have any suggestions for upcoming events, please let me know. I will be happy to put in some OC's at any chance I can. The story shall get interesting! Thanks for reading, bye!**


	3. Uh oh...

Virgil's POV

I look up at Patton with fear in my eyes. I shouldn't have said that knowing that Patton was in "Dad-protective mode". But I feel so mad at the moment and I couldn't hide my feelings anymore. His shirt was so warm and his hug was so....calming. I just blurted out his name without thinking. Almost instantly, Patton's eyes grew wide and alarmed. "P-Patton? Are you...okay?" I got up and stared at him, wondering what would happen next. He rose from the bed, gave me a small smile, and said, "Yes, I'm fine. I'll be right back I uh....forgot to....turn off the stove!" He quickly rushed out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

I reached out towards him, wanting him to stay so I could lean against him for as long as I needed. But he was gone.....with such a weird excuse. But he had that look in his eye....similar to when Logan got a bad grade on a test when Thomas was younger. Something was going to happen. And I didn't want to be the reason. As fast as I could, I raced after Patton and arrived just in time to hear him shouting at one of the others. I crept up to the edge of the wall, close enough to hear the conversation without them knowing I was there.

 

Roman's POV

 

I decided to make a snack while thinking about Virgil. One thing people never knew about me is that I cook when I'm distressed. While washing my hands, I hear banging coming from above. "Hmm..? I someone there?", I called out. After a few moments of silence, I turn around to head upstairs. "AHH!!", I screamed. "P-Patton you s-scared me!" My heart beat slows down a bit as I dry my hands off. "So...how's Virgil?", I asked him. As soon as the words left my mouth, Patton socked me in the stomach and grabbed my shirt. "What the hell, Patton?" Uh oh. I noticed the symptoms. The sudden appearance, the lack of words, no cheeriness, and of course...violence. He was in "Dad-protective" mode. 

"WHAT did you do to Virgil?", Patton yelled. I looked at him with curiosity and tried backing away, which was useless considering that his grip on my shirt tightened with each second passing. I'd been through this before when Logan claimed he was never listened to in Thomas' younger years. "Patton, I need you to breathe for me. Close your eyes, and breathe." Thankfully, he did as instructed and his grip loosened. "Good, now sit down and I'll get you a glass of water" I released his hands from my shirt and sat him down in the nearest chair. Quickly, I got his beverage and set it before him. "Now, calm down and tell me what happened" Staring at the table, he mumbled a few incomprehensible words. Sighing, I called Logan into the room. 

 

Logan's POV

 

Sitting at my computer, I've been trying to make Thomas' schedule for next week so that way he gets everything done that he needs to. The man needs to learn to multitask. If only there were more hours in a day. Or less things distracting Thomas. Suddenly, I hear a voice call my name. Putting my notebook down, I head into the kitchen to see Roman looking nervously at Patton, who seemed shaky and....distraught. "Roman, you called for me?". He pointed to the saddened dad figure. "What seems to be the issue at hand?" Roman sighed and explained to me what had just happened in the kitchen between the two. Sitting down next to Patton, I grab his hand and squeeze it tightly. Without any words, Patton hugs me and shoots dagger looks at Roman. *offended princey noises* "Roman, please leave the room for a moment." He nodded and left the room. He nodded and left the kitchen at once. 

"P-patton, may I ask what caused you to attack Roman?" He looked up at me with surprise, tears filled in his eyes. With as much composure as he could muster, he quickly told me what he encountered in Virgil's room. By the end of his story, I have to admit that I felt bad for Patton. It pains him to see any of his figurative "children" in distress. I hugged the poor, shaky guy and tried to whisper comforting words to calm him down. As if on cue, a loud, high-pitched scream came from the living room.

 

 

**Hello everyone! Again, sorry it took me a little bit to make for this chapter but.....I am already working on the next one so it shouldn't take TOO long to make. I promise, it'll get better. So just stick around! And like I said previously, please give me suggestions for upcoming chapters!! Thanks for reading, bye!**


	4. The Disease

Virgil's POV

 

Running towards my room, I fall and trip on the stairs. My blurred vision did nothing to help me. I...I couldn't stand the yelling. Hearing Patton yell is like a death wish to the person he's talking to. I didn't want Roman to be put in harms way even if he deserved it. It made me feel like an idiot. A person who didn't deserve to live. I got up, ran straight into my room and locked the door. Pulling out my blade, I try to make a cut but my hands are shaking too much. 

"Oh but Virgil, you have so much to live for." I look up quickly to see a figure standing in front of me. Deceit. With hatred, I retort, "Well at least Thomas doesn't completely ignore me, like he does to you." He chuckles and lifts my chin, forcing me to look at him. Growling, I try to struggle out of his grasp but fail. "Virgil, you know that they think of you as a disease. Roman said so when he first met you." My eyes grow wide as I think of the memory. 

*Flashback*

It was the first day that Thomas required me. I was a little nervous but happy to leave the dreaded "Dark Sides". While Thomas was getting ready for a video, I was called in for a mandatory meeting with the other sides. Sitting in front of the others, the logic side began to speak: "I don't see a reason for this meeting, Roman. All Anxiety is here for is because he's an essential side to Thomas. Nothing to worry about." Relieved that Logan was okay with my being there, I gave a small smile but quickly covered it. Just as suddenly, Roman, the creative side, pulled out his sword and looked at me with curiosity. "Logan, we don't need him. All he'll do it criticize me and worry Thomas. He's nothing but a DISEASE." The morality side gasps and begins to scold him. All I can manage to do is shrink smaller and smaller. Without speaking to the others, I run away into my room. That one word, disease. It stung my heart and created something I had never done before: tears. They wouldn't stop. They spilled until I had none left. That was the day that I had first cut. The first sight of blood coming from my arm. But it felt so good to relieve some of my stress. 

*Flashback ends*

Without realizing, I'm crying in front of Deceit. Sobbing, shaking. I wipe the tears from my cheeks and stand up. Time to move on to Plan B. Slowly, I go to my closet and grab the long rope that I've stored away. "Yes. This is the only option, my poor friend," he whispers to me. With shaky hands, I tie the rope to the fan up above and grab a chair. Panicking, I stand on the chair, put my head in the little loop, and stand there, not allowing my body to step off. What would the others think? How would Thomas feel without his anxiety? Disease... The dreaded word repeats in my head. "Good, Virgil. Now all you have to do is simply...step off", Deceit says softly. 

Realizing what must be done, I step off and let the chair fall to the ground. At the same time, someone knocks on my door. "Oh god what do I do?" The knocking continues. "Don't worry, my bestest friend, I'll cover for you, " Deceit says to me. In my voice, Deceit says, "Go away, nothing's wrong." He was surprisingly good at an impression of me that my heart skipped a beat. A muffled sound comes from the other side of the door as it slowly creaks open. As I'm struggling to somehow keep the door closed, Roman enters and emits a shriek of terror. 

 

Roman's POV

 

While Logan was calming down Patton, I decided to pay Virgil another visit. It can't hurt, right? I mean, maybe he's calmed down since he talked to the dad side. But something couldn't leave my thoughts. Patton asked me what I did to Virgil. Was I the reason for his sudden fear and panic? As I approach the door, I give a couple knocks and wait for a reply. That's strange...he almost always gives some sort of notion that he doesn't want me in. I knock again and that time finally gives a reply. "Go away, nothing's wrong ," I hear from within. Of course I don't believe him, I've heard crying from his room all morning. "Virgil, I know that something's wrong and I can't help but to think that it's my cause. May I come in?" Again, no reply. I reach my hand towards the handle and jiggle it. Hm. It's unlocked....that's peculiar. As I push on the door gently, something pushes me back. Like....like a force or something. Or maybe Virgil just blocked the door with a chair like last time. I give the door another budge, this time more forcefully. It opens and I walk in quietly. Right as I walk in, I see.....Virgil. He's...he's hanging from the ceiling. 

Without thinking, I let out my Talyn-shriek. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Deceit disappear. Of course he had something to do with this. I take out my sword and try very carefully and quickly to cut the rope to let Virgil down. With a thud, Virgil falls to the floor. His small, fragile body starts spazzing out and he let out a large sob. Letting out another shriek, I run over to him, scoop him up, and lay him in his bed. Immediately, he sits up and starts hyperventilating. I sit down next to him and begin rubbing his back in slow circles. I try whispering words of comfort but to my dismay, Virgil is still panicking and his breathing slowly gets quicker. I run my hands through his hair and give him a tight hug. "What were you thinking, Virge?" He starts to sob into my shoulder and I continue calming him down. His door bursts open and I see Logan and Patton enter, panting from running. 

With watery eyes, I motion for them to sit on the bed and help me out. Releasing Virgil into the arms of Patton, I stand up and begin crying. "G-guys? I have to tell you something." I sigh and look at them silently. Logan motions for me to go on. "Um....I came in here to ya know....talk to Virgil and.....I saw him..." I begin explaining the sight that I saw just moments ago. Patton looks at his sad, emo nightmare son and slaps his arm lightly. "Virge, you can't do that! We can't live without you, we love you ," Patton said while trying not to cry. I noticed that Logan decided to crawl into the corner and silently weep. I look at Virgil and whisper, "Is this my fault?" Patton gasps and releases Virgil for a second to give me a hug. I pull him in tighter and whisper apologies to him. He shushes me and looks at Virgil. I do the same, holding my breath, waiting for Virgil's answer...

 

**Hello readers! This chapter was a little bit rushed so it wasn't as good as I had hoped. But I will try going more into depth with details in later chapters. Until next time....take it easy guys, gals, and non-binary pals....PEACE OUT!!**


	5. The Plan

I look at Virgil and whisper, "Is this my fault?" Patton gasps and releases Virgil for a second to give me a hug. I pull him in tighter and whisper apologies to him. He shushes me and looks at Virgil. I do the same, holding my breath, waiting for Virgil's answer... 

 

*TRIGGER WARNING: mentions of SUICIDE*

Seriously guys, if you'd prefer not to imagine a side or Thomas hurt by self harming, please do not read this chapter I'm so sorry...

____________________________________________________________

Virgil's POV

 

Shivering and still a little frightened, I look at him with disgust. "Y-you know what you did. What you said."

"Please", he asks. "What did I do wrong to deserve such a terrible punishment?"

 

*Another Flashback begins*

 

After I had left to my room that night, I listened in on their conversation a little further. "Logan, you know that he will just bring us all down!" I knew that sarcastic voice. Roman. "He's going to overtake the GOOD in Thomas' life! Can't you see it, calculator watch?"

I gasp and my eyes start watering yet again. Hoping that Logan will contradict him, I listen a little closer. Soon enough, Logan says, "Now Roman, a little anxiety isn't bad for Thomas. Really, it will help him make smarter decisions, seeing as he doesn't always listen to me." I sigh with relief until I hear him speak again. "But maybe there's something we can do to lessen the amount that Anxiety will bring to the table." I hear Logan bring out a pen and click it rapidly. "Perhaps....we can get some kind of medicine for him...."

I gasp quickly and my heart begins to ache. I start to think: they want to get rid of me? I thought that they didn't mind my being there. And I never expected Logan, of all people, to turn against me. After a couple of short minutes, Roman's voice comes back. "That's not enough, that'll just anger him even more. We need to make him feel as if he is unwelcome here. Make him leave voluntarily. Yes, that's the plan, my friend." 

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Everyday after that, they made my life a living hell. Always trying to tempt me out of my room to do a video, only to be made fun of. It was horrible, like your worst nightmare being played over and over again. All I wanted was to feel wanted, or to even fit in.

*Flashback ends*

 

"V-Virge?", I hear someone say. 

"Hmm..?"

"You've spaced out, kiddo", Patton chuckles. "Are you okay?"

I just stare at him and give him a small smile. "Oh. Yes....I'm fine." He never knew what they did to me, how could he? He was always the one to make us feel loved. 

"Falsehood."

My breath shortens and I turn around, sighing in relief that it was just Logan. 

"You are not fine if you considered ending your life. You are not fine if you actually went through with it." Logan then gets up and sits down next to me, looking at the marks on my neck. "We need to get this covered up so that Thomas won't see it. He'll worry too much."

Frustrated at all of the personal space invasion, I whisper, "Please, everyone just leave me alone now, okay? I'm tired....I need some sleep."

It pained me to see Logan in such a fragile state. I could see the wet tear marks on his cheeks. The way his skin was red and blotchy from the crying. I think he realized what caused my actions, maybe he even felt a little guilty. One can hope, right? Logan managed to speak throughout the painful silence, "Can I stay for a little while...please?"

 

Logan's POV

As soon as the other two left the room, I got up and began pacing the floor in a rather fast pace. I couldn't stop thinking of how horrific that sight was for Roman. Although I am still confused of the sudden emotion that filled my heart, making it ache. 

"V-Virge?", I mutter.

He shifts on the bed and stares at me before slowly responding with a yes. 

"Answer me truthfully on this next question, please."

He sneers and stares blankly, choosing not to answer.

"Did I cause this in some way? I can't help but think that had something do do with your actions."

Instantly, the smirk is wiped off of Virgil's face and he looks down, cheeks growing red. I knew it. I shouldn't have sided with Roman upon his arrival. I knew that it would hurt him, I was just trying to help Thomas out. Obviously, it backfired. A thought popped into my head. "Where's Thomas??" If Virgil had tried something terrible...does that mean that Thomas will as well? "I-I'm sorry, Virgil, but I must check on Thomas. Please, come with me so that I know you're safe. You shouldn't be alone with such dark thoughts." I stand up and reach out my hand, feeling relieved when he grabbed it so I could pull him to his feet. 

Together, we walk to Thomas' room and see a figure hovering by the doorway. I clutch Virgil's hand and loudly ask, "Who is there? Show yourself" Someone steps out and I see a camera flash. Of course. The shadow figure was Remy. After all, it's quite late at night but Remy should be inside as we speak. 

"What are you doing out here, Remy?"

"Well obviously Thomas is busy with someone else. Nope, I'm done, I'm out of here. He's been shutting me out all afternoon and now when I'm genuinely here for him he ignores me?"

"You know that people don't prefer sleeping until much late at night, correct? It made no sense to come in the evening."

Mockingly, he says, "It made no sense bla bla bla"

Virgil chuckles and fist bumps with Remy. Apparently they've grown closer recently. Curiously, I open Thomas' door and walk inside. That's funny.....he isn't in here. Oh wait, I hear the faucet water running in the bathroom. I walk to the door and give it a light knock. "Thomas, are you good?" The water stops and the door opens, Thomas walks past me quickly and sits on his bed. "Yes, Logan, I'm quite well, why do you ask?" He turned on the TV and started watching "The Office"

I chose not to worry him for the time being. But he needs to know eventually. "Oh, no reason." I go to turn off his bathroom light and to scold him about wasting electricity when I notice an unfamiliar bottle by the sink. I peek at Thomas who was staring at his comforter and then I go and pick up the bottle. It's empty. My logical sensations were going off in my mind. "Thomas....what is this?"

He stares at me, saying nothing at all. Sternly, I repeat the question and again, no response. "How much did you take right now?" His skin was growing paler and his body starting shaking. I call for Virgil and Remy to come in. "Virgil, call Thomas' closest nearby friends and tell them he needs help, and to hurry" He looks at me fearfully but does as told. "Remy, call 911 and tell them Thomas took something that's harmful for his body"

Roman and Patton were standing by, watching the two panic stricken sides, not knowing what to do. Poor Patton was standing against the wall, tears streaming down his cheeks. Roman was speechless, unable to comprehend what was happening. Shortly, Thomas starting coughing and breathing rapidly. I run over to him and hand him a bottle of water (I always have one on me) forcing him to drink some water, I thought it would help his situation. I begged him to lay down and do his breathing techniques hoping that he would remain conscious before it was too late.

Tears formed in my eyes. "Hold on, Thomas, help is on the way" 

 

Hey everyone! I'm sorry for such a short chapter. Again, I rushed this one so it's not too good. I promise, I'll try better in the future. And yes, there will be tears coming later on along with rebellious behavior. And someone will come in later....🐍🖤


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